Posted by Sacramento Ram. Ich finds echt suoer. Lest es mal durch. Viel Spaß. Ramsi. PS: Wo er recht hat, hat er......,.,..

The Good Lord above came to me in a dream last night and bade me write this post:

"Sac," he says...he always calls me Sac when he wants to talk football. for other matters more spiritual, he's more of a listener not a talker.

Anyway, "Sac," he says, "You will go to the Dagoba system. there seek Yoda. Um..no wait. You will write a post on the Forum urging the Rams to take some beefy, dirt-eating, lane-clogging run-stuffing Hogs of HIGH moral character with their first pick in next months draft. I would do it myself, but with Easter coming, I am as you might expect a little busy."

I reply, "Yes, Lord. Defensive Linemen first. Amen."

As an aside he also added, "And try to visit my house now and again. I havent seen you there since the Clinton Administration, and you dont want to get on my bad side, do you?"

"No, sir," i replied. "by the way, we're not going to ever have ANOTHER clinton administration, are we Lord?"

with that he laughed in his comforting, lordly way, and kind of coughed under his breath and said, "Uh...no. one was quite enuff for me. the first one kind of snuck past me. My bad. wont happen again, I promise."

"Well," i said, "thats a relief. thank you."

"But" he intoned, "having said that, I want to see you take a pew once in awhile."

I replied again, "Yes, sir. I will do as you ask. I do worship you in my own way. you know that, dont you?

"Yes", he said. "And thats ok, too. but i want to see you IN the HOUSE.
Fall Sundays are sacred, i understand that part." with this he gave another little knowing laugh. "But it's March, son. and the NCAA tournament is almost over."

I asked somewhat mischieviously, "Um, yeah...any way you might let me in on anything about which you are aware, you know, with regard to the Final Four?"

"No," he said. I cant do that. you know the rules. I will help you read the tea leaves, but i cant give you the answer."

"OK, Lord. Now, back to the Rams. Will we have a good season next year? Can we count on your support?"

With that he said, "I will help the Rams to the exact degree which they help themselves! If the Rams are true and good and motivated and avoid turnovers, thuggism and IF improve their run defense, I will be favorably disposed towards them. Remember 1999?? that was me. I taped every game. theres Sainthood waiting for Mike Jones and Reverend Isaac."

"Excellent, sir. Praise be unto you. Anything else, my Lord?" i asked. "Yes, just one thing. I will throw you a bone because you have been patient and reverent towards me today: The Seahawks and 49ers REALLY displease me. THAT much i can tell you."

"Oh, thank you Lord. Thank you. I KNEW it."

He added, "Although, to tell a family secret, i always admired Joe Montana Ronnie Lott, Roger Craig and Jerry Rice. even when they were beating the Rams like Romans on Galileans. They were my handiwork, too, dont forget. And why isnt John Taylor in the HOF yet? do i have to intervene? I mean, c'mon. I have both Torry and Isaac on my short list. and both Swannie and Stallworth are in, so why not JT?"

"I dont know, Lord. I always respected them too, even as I cursed their mothers...remember?"

"Yes, yes I remember", he said impatiently. "Now get on with my work: Obey the Golden Rule, Be Excellent to Each Other, and Draft for the DEFENSE!!"

Amen.